Now that ChatGPT/AI is able to write an article on anything in less than a minute, I am switching my focus as a writer to that which makes us human: our personal stories. I contemplated keeping this private because it’s so dear to my heart; but after six strokes (one legit stroke and five TIAs), I worry about losing my memory, and this is a memory I not only want to remember but one I want to share to inspire others. If deeply personal and transparent stories of love, connection, and triumph over trials and tribulations are something you’d like to read about, please help this author make a living with a paid subscription to this Substack. Thank you.
The perfect gift is usually a combination of something wanted, something needed, and something unexpected which is exactly what having a child turned out to be for me. I’ve written many essays about the healing nature my daughter’s love, which I consider my greatest blessing. These are just two such pieces: So This Is Love and Love: When You Meet Your Match, The Love You Give Is the Love You Receive. This piece, however, is about an actual gift she gave me that still has me in an afterglow of awe.
My daughter was 15 the first time she used her own money to buy a gift for me that she had thought of completely on her own. It was a figurine of a goddess holding a sphere in her hands with all four elements: water, earth, fire, and air. Then she hand-painted and crafted three custom discs to interchange with the elements disc; one as the earth and the other was a single feather. Then she crafted a paper clip as an easel for a tiny picture and frame and made a mini masterpiece of a white feather, a symbol of, she says, the purity of my heart.
The gifts were accompanied by a lovely hand-written letter; the sentiments of which were, “Mommy, you are the Goddess Aletheia. The goddess of Truth and Justice!”
Are you crying yet, because I certainly was.
Her birthday and Mother’s Day gifts for me over the years have all surrounded a single theme: Aletheia/Althea, “truth or disclosure in philosophy.” While primarily Greek mythology, it’s also referenced in the Bible: “‘Truth’ in John 17:17 is the Greek word aletheia, which means ‘reality, the manifested, unconcealed essence of a matter.’ Truth is the reality lying at the foundation of a righteous example. It is pure unadulterated reality.” (Bibletools.org)
This year, my daughter gave me a small, meaningful, precious, white feather lapel pin. Which references Goddess Ma’at’s feather of truth and justice. If the heart proves true and the life good, feather and heart will balance equally, granting access to the afterlife. If the heart is heavier than the feather, it is considered evidence of corruption. My beloved daughter, Gracie, often sweetly tells me that my heart is pure and light as the feather.
I get a lump in my throat just reading this.
In searching for references, I found this description of the Goddess and her husband which for our home, holds particular specialness. For I do see the similarities in my partnership with my husband as is listed here between this version of Althea (goddess of healing and compassion) and her husband (knight of justice) …
“Althea is also known as the goddess of healing and compassion. She inspires people to trust in the triumph of good, to undertake compassion and mercy, and to support one’s community and family. She provides the comfort of healing as she provides the comfort of the hearth and a loving home. Restoration is her divine right and she seeks to aid in the healing of the soul. … The path that Althea walks is a hard one. Those who follow her calling often need to shine like beacons and possess an inner strength, illuminating the darkness to bring those lost into the light. They are asked to exhibit patience and seek understanding before acting. As her husband is the knight of justice, so Althea is the heart of his order. Working together, they believe in the upholding of the principles of what is good, and to stand against the corrupting forces of darkness. If he is its executor, she is its foundation. These principles are reflected in their respective clergies. Embodying kindness, love, compassion and tolerance, her followers work to bring hope to others. As great counselors and comforters, especially in times of need, their wisdom is rarely spurned. Willing to listen, their truthful words can only strengthen hearts in the long run.” (Tenebraemush.net)
Wow! Can you imagine having your daughter see the best in you to such a powerful and humbling level of hopeful resonance? Many younger children idolize their parents; but by the teen years, the wood used to build the pedestal is often repurposed to burn one at the stake. Yet, our mother/daughter relationship only grows closer with each passing year. This is a true gift of healing, as I never had an opportunity for a healthy relationship with my absent, drug-addicted mother.
When I bask in the love of my little family, I ask myself, “What did I do to deserve this love, to be seen in this way?” My daughter assures me this is not a pedestal but her ability to see my imperfect humanness in an endless, Sisyphean climb to leave the world better than I found it. She is witness to every Lightworker battle from inner circles with loved ones to outer circles spanning local and global governments, to call people into truth and right action. These crusades often leave me feeling very empathetically raw and alone. Rare empathy seems to be surrounded by a wall of common apathy created by an addiction to certainty and a desire to be endlessly distracted and entertained. I wade in that place of surrender so as to not swim upstream while staying in my integrity so as to not get swept away in the current of the crowd. I don’t think I could do this work, my life’s purpose, without the support of those closest to me.
To know that my beloved husband, a small circle of dear friends, and my miracle child see the best of me and support my purpose in life is a great comfort in the face of resistance and rejection by others.
This is a Post-it my husband placed on our refrigerator to remind me that his, my daughter’s and my closest friends' words and beliefs about who I am are the ones he wants me most to focus on.
It reads, “The people who know you the best love you the most.”
Having a daughter who sees me as a Goddess of truth and justice is a pretty remarkable gift in and of itself, having the sweet feather lapel pin, Goddess statue, and feather in frame are lovely symbols of all my blessings. Even still, nothing prepared me for the homemade gift she created and was able to surprise me with (not an easy feat between two telepathic psychics).
The Triskele Surprise
Each year, about three months before my birthday, my daughter starts asking me, “What would you like for your birthday?” Every year I answer the same, “To spend time with you and Daddy at the beach, hear from my loved ones, eat cake, and receive in-person visits or FaceTime calls from my nieces and nephews.”
A couple of birthdays ago, my loving daughter went out of her way to make my birthday special with four loving gestures. First, she made an incredible egg-free version of my favorite lemon coconut cake. Between the preparation of the cake, the rest time of the cake (water baths, chilling, cooling, etc.) and the presentation of the cake, she spent 10 hours! The payoff was huge because both my husband and I agree that it was the most delicious cake we’ve ever had in our entire lives. We allowed each bite to dance across our tongues and spent 30 minutes savoring this delightful delicacy. We could taste the love.
Second, she placed an ink print of her precious palm in a beach themed frame, two of my favorite things to hold: her hand and the ocean.
Third, she was exquisitely present. Throughout the day and night, I received wonderful text messages and calls from loved ones which filled my heart. My face lights up when I get to see my loved ones in person or on FaceTime. However, as women age, we can begin to feel more invisible and less like anyone really wants or cares whether they actually “see” us. For various understandable and logistical reasons I was unable to have any FaceTime calls from family on my actual birthday (however, plenty leading up to and after). As I was privately contemplating the philosophy of what it means to “be seen,” my daughter said, “You look sad, Mommy. Are you okay?” I smiled and said, “How could I not be okay with this amazing cake, my incredible family, and all this love?” She said, “Are you sad that you didn’t get to have FaceTime with family?” I took a deep inhale, nodded, and was embarrassed by my hypersensitivity, when I felt my eyes start to fill with tears. Ever since my diagnosis, I never know which birthday will be my last; and having quality with the people I love has become more important than ever for me. That’s when my daughter gave me my third gift. She got up, left the room, and one minute later my phone rang. It was my daughter FaceTiming me saying, “I’m your family and I’m FaceTiming you.” In that moment, I felt more seen, heard, and loved than possibly any other in all my years. She was reminding me that her love was more than enough.
Then, she astonished me with my fourth and final gift, which she said was inspired by her favorite chapter, Hope, that I wrote in Sage Words FREEDOM Book One. In the book, I use the simile of carrying lint in one’s pocket to carrying hope in one’s heart, not a very pretty picture or poetic point; but for my daughter, it was amusing and memorable. Gracie knows that my love language is words of affirmation. She put a great deal of thought into creating a gift that was in line with my love language. She wanted me to have a different word that defined who I am, in her eyes, to carry in my pocket every day of the year. In her journey to find 365 loving words to describe me, she found 465! Using only recycled materials and her own self-taught engineering and design concepts, she created something I’d never seen before, a gift completely and utterly unique to me, a Triskelion, Words of Affirmation Box.
My daughter is drawn to all things Celtic and symbolic. She painted the back of the box black and used gold leaf foil to create a triskelion. The spiral that spins clockwise (from the inside-out) represents growth, expansion, evolution, harmony, and cosmic energy. It can also represent the inner (spiritual) and outer (physical) worlds and the connection between the two. The center of the spiral is often associated with the Source, God, or One Consciousness, out of which everything emerges. The spiral emerging from the center and expanding outwardly in all directions in an everlasting manner represents creation, cosmic energy, and infinite possibilities. It also represents the cyclic nature of the universe.
Using wooden dowels, she constructed rows of what look almost like old rolls of stamps, one for each letter in the alphabet. Then, she handmade a small stamp in the design of a leaf. Next, she took strips of paper and created perforated lines every inch or so. From there she hand stamped each and every one-inch square. She then taught herself how to write in a typewriter style font and hand wrote each of the 465 words she had spent three weeks collecting.
Then, she alphabetized the strips of paper, glued one end to the other, and gently wrapped each letter around the portion of the dowel she had created for it. All the while, I had no idea what she was working on for three weeks, late at night and on the weekends, only that it was a surprise for my birthday.
She painted the cardboard black and made a swinging door to the box complete with hinges made from tightly rolled paper. The front had each letter of the alphabet from which to choose a word, with an accompanying cubby filled with a roll of words. She used old beads as the feet so that it stood like a jewelry box, filled with treasures even greater than gems: words and meaning, my love language.
Here are some of the words she wrote. With each new word I retrieve, I place it in a teacup at the end of my bed; my cup is overflowing with words of love and delight.
Beloved
Vivacious
Timeless
Ethical
Psychic
Badass
Genius
Talented
Philosopher
Masterful
Understanding
Poetic
Comforting
Knowing
Decisive
Protective
Unique
Educated
Progressive
The best gift is being seen and loved for who we actually are, and who we do our best to be; and these gifts really exemplify those sentiments. Our little family of three lives a relatively simple life of simple pleasures, like spending time as a family at the beach or engaging in creative pursuits. We’ve worked really diligently to create a life we don’t need a vacation from, in large part through slow living and simple pleasures. My incredibly thoughtful, loving, and artistic daughter always comes up with the most considerate and heartfelt gifts.
Image: Mother and daughter lovingly embrace on Mother’s Day while standing on a pier over the Pacific Ocean.
Please remember stories like this of personal connection as the next slew of books and articles to perforate society will be written in large part by ChatGBT and other AI tools. To remember my story is to remember our shared humanity.
Sage Justice is an author, activist, and performing artist. She is committed to being the change she wants to see in the world through her work with The Unity Project; merging art with activism with a special emphasis on ending homelessness. If her words resonate with you, please donate to the cause (check out the auction for Disney collectibles, jewelry, and more) and please share this post with others.
If you found value from this short story, please subscribe to SageJustice.Substack.com for just $5 a month, or a yearly subscription is $45, where you can check out the origin story for The Unity Project, in “So This Is Love” (February 2024), or “Lightworkers: Who Are They? Why Should We Care? Could You Be a Lightworker? (November 2023) or if you’re interested in creating a life you don’t need a vacation from and the topic of loving with a boundless heart while maintaining boundaries so as to not be a doormat, please consider purchasing a copy of Sage Words FREEDOM Book One.
Tags #mother #daughter #relationship #healthy #healing #Howto #FeelBetter #love #loved #family #gifts #goddess #truth #justice #Althea #mothersday #healthymotherdaughterrelationship #healthymarriage #happyfamily #givinggifts #thoughtful #considerate #caring #whitefeather #lemoncoconutcake #Triskele #triskelion #celtic